Who are you?

Who am I?

It’s the existential question of the meaning of life, isn’t it!

I listened to an interesting podcast this week on healing and personal transformation. The guest expert explained that the reason we don’t achieve what we aspire to is that we don’t evolve our identity as we evolve our aspirations.

So, what does that mean exactly?

It means that just like the caterpillar has to change into a butterfly to fly away, we have to evolve our identity to match our aspirations.

Hmmm… interesting, right? So, in simple terms….

It’s hard to be an adult when we still see ourselves as kids.

It’s hard to lead others when we’re looking for others to follow.

It’s hard to speak up when we’re waiting to be spoken to.

The challenge we face is that a large part of our identity is formed as children. It’s those formative years that we learn who we should be and who we need to be to fit in, be accepted, stay safe and belong to our tribe. If we don’t evolve that identity as we grow up, we remain stuck and find it hard to move forward.

So, we settle.

We decide our dreams are too big for us.

We give up on them.

But what if it didn’t have to be that way? If you decided those dreams were worth chasing after all?

Would you do whatever it takes?

Would you surrender to the discomfort?

Would you persist even if it meant making others uncomfortable?

Big questions for a big life, hey?

The chances are that evolving into a new identity requires some pain. Some are letting go of old beliefs, stories, and relationship patterns. It involves facing the things you fear the most – rejection, being ostracised, criticised, leaving others behind. So, here are some questions for you to ponder as you decide if you’re big dreams are worth changing your current identity for:

- Who would I have to disappoint if I chased my dreams?

- What would I have to believe about myself to confidently pursue that promotion?

- Who do I have to get out of my head to step into the leader I see myself as?

- What do I have to know to evolve to the next level of who I want to become?

- What would be possible for me if I were prepared to surrender to possibility?

So, what’s it to be? Is your dream worth a new identity?