Truth #5: Embrace the sisterhood

If there is one thing that we have collectively learnt through COVID, it’s how much we rely on in-person connection with each other. Whether it be making small talk to someone in the hallways at work, being in the company of others in a busy shopping centre, a hug from a loved one, or just being amongst the action as we take a walk outside or hang out in a coffee shop. That sense of others being around us is profound. We’re not meant to do this thing called life alone.

And so, the final truth, Truth #5 Seek Out the Sisterhood from my publication Leading with Power, speaks directly to this.

Intellectually, we know we can achieve greater things when we work with others. We know that innovation is sparked from the diverse ideas brought forward by the group, and we know we learn and grow when others challenge our thinking and offer new perspectives we wouldn’t think of on our own. And yet we live in a world that celebrates the individual. We work in workplaces where asking for help or clarification is seen as a weakness, where ideas and behaviours that challenge the norm are rejected and where success is predicated on individual contributions.

But as women, we are social beings. We share a common connection. We form communities and friendships. We connect by sharing secrets, ideas and our fears with each other. But we also suffer from the afflictions of comparison. We are taught early what a “good” and a “nice” girl looks like and how she behaves. We are told to avoid those that don’t fit the mould. Girls who are too much, too loud. Girls who make others feel uncomfortable or put themselves first. And so, we judge, we compare, we shun, and we reject them. Many argue that this is the work of the patriarchy. Keeping women small and pitting them against each other by the fears that women have of being labelled and judged. The stakes are high, as the fears and the trauma that our ancestors suffered at the hands of others run deep. We all know that feeling of not being safe that lives deep in every woman. This is often referred to as the witch wound.

And so, we need to seek out the sisterhood. To accept and support each other as we work our way out of this trauma in our own ways. Whether that be bucking the system, speaking our truth, fighting for equal rights or talking about things that are uncomfortable or taboo. We are all in this together, and so we need to recognise and support our sisters as they find their voice, even when we don’t agree with everything she has to say.

So, what is one thing you can do to embrace the sisterhood?

When you are wronged by another woman, call her in instead of calling her out. Understand that on a cellular level that she too suffers the same wounds, fears and insecurities you do. She too occupies the same space – one that doesn’t allow her to be the full expression of herself. What if, instead of judging her on the surface, you could deeply admire and respect the courage she shows just by turning up and having an opinion?

Imagine if we were to draw strength from each other, and no matter where we were or what we were doing, we could acknowledge each other as we pass, we silently say – I see you, I hear you, I feel you. ​

Now that’s what I call the sisterhood.

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