The price of wellbeing

I paid ONE MILLION DOLLARS for my mental well-being.

Yup, crazy but true! At 4,7, I was a SESB1 in the APS, burned out, broken and disconnected. 

I’d worked my way through the APS ranks for 11 years to land my dream job working for 3.5 years on a massive organisational change project, which took everything I had and then some. It had some intense highs and some deep lows.

It was the deep lows that left me with nothing in the tank and a lost sense of self. It led me to pay the ultimate price by leaving a career I loved and a salary that matched it.

Now, at 53, that’s 6 years of prime earning capacity not realised. No multiple six-figure salary, no compounding benefits of superannuation, no promotions, no accrued sick leave or holiday pay. 

I’m not sorry that I left, but I do appreciate how privileged I was to have the choice to do so.

So many women I work with don’t have that choice.

Instead....

• They become a shadow of themselves, doubting their ability and fearful of what could come next.
• They get on with it, but never fully recover and therefore never reach their full potential.
• They withdraw, become compliant, unable to fully engage or show up authentically at work.
• They move jobs but take their scars with them.
• They avoid conflict at all costs, stifling their creativity and career aspirations.

It’s time for this to stop.

We need these women in senior roles. Not those who’ve had to completely abandon themselves, turning into who they think they must be to be accepted back in the fold. No, those who have done the inner work to grow into a new version of what leadership can look like.

Why?

Because the current construct of leadership is masculine. It’s been built by men for men. It was never designed for women. It’s like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. The system of leadership we've learnt suppresses the natural influence and power inherent to women! It’s time to reclaim this. 

We need women who recognise that the social stigmas and stereotypes about being female that we all grew up with have, by their very nature, affected our experience at work. Never more so than when we reach positions with influence and power. And, while it’s not the sole responsibility of women to create the paradigm shift needed for more inclusive workplaces, individually and collectively, we can make a difference. Every time one of us chooses to step up and do the inner work, we create a ripple of possibility for those around us.

So, if you’re a senior leader at a crossroads in your career, wondering if the sacrifice is worth it, don’t pay a million dollars like I did. Instead, INVEST in yourself and become that changemaker and visionary you always knew you were capable of being. Take the time to notice and change the disempowering stories and the limiting beliefs you grew up with about what it means to be a woman in charge. Learn how the relationship patterns you learnt as a little you are now showing up at work. Get a coach, join a program, read a book, subscribe to a podcast.

Choose you and you choose us all.